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Author Topic: Who would u marry?  (Read 4159 times)
Jannah
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Who would u marry?
« on: January 18, 2007, 03:34:36 PM »

Salam,

K here's a light hearted topic... these philosophical questions always come up amongst girls at 2 o' clock in the morning Wink we had a good time discussing this one in nyc this weekend... thought i'd ask u guys (esp if someone's married their thoughts would be interesting too):

Say you only had two choices: Would you marry someone who you loved and didn't love you or someone who loved you and you didn't love.... and why?

and btw we had a theory about brothers and sisters answers but i'll let u answer first...
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2007, 03:56:25 PM »

 [slm]

I bet this is a trick question  [moroccan] [wiseshaykh]

 Tongue
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Jannah
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2007, 03:59:43 PM »

[wlm]

lol.. it's not!!! either answer is right :p it's just about psychology our discussion was so heated.. i just wanna know what other ppl think Wink
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M.F.
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #3 on: January 18, 2007, 06:16:54 PM »

Assalamu alaikum
I don't know why anyone would put themselves in a situation where they weren't loved back.  It would just hurt too much!! 
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Fozia
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #4 on: January 18, 2007, 07:07:30 PM »

[slm]

Yeah spinsterhood for me too.
Unless I liked the guy who loved me. I can work with like.
However if I actively disliked the guy who loved me, no way could I end up being married to them.

As for marrying an unrequited love, no!


Wassalaam
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Jannah
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #5 on: January 18, 2007, 07:15:59 PM »

salam,

heloooooooooo there are only two options!!!

ws

Smiley
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owais
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #6 on: January 18, 2007, 07:48:41 PM »


Firstly Allaho alim , teh he.

I think one feels more secure when they are loved.
And Love spreads.  So even if One doesn't love the other, but the other loves them, I think the love would still spread somehow.

So for the secure case, I think I'd be loved rather than being the one who loves with no lover back.

Does that make sense? Typical that girls would get a heated debate out of this.

lastly, Allahoalim.

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Siham
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #7 on: January 18, 2007, 08:12:49 PM »

As-Salaamu `alaykum,

Well as a lady I would probably go for a man who loves me (more) because the man is certainly the one who has to do a lot of things to impress you at first. (I think this is the best part of being a woman lol) So if he's really not into you, then its not gonna work out!

Besides, women do have tender hearts and therefore have the tendency of falling in love easily.

And Allah(SubHana Wa Ta`ala) knows best.

W'salaam
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"You talk about loving God while you disobey Him; I swear by my life that this is something very strange. If you were truthful in your love, you would obey Him, for a lover obeys whom he loves." (Rabi`a al-Adawiyya)
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2007, 02:24:22 AM »

[slm]

My mom says that a marriage cannot survive on a woman's passion alone.  But a marriage CAN survive and blossom on a man's passion alone.  After years of disagreeing with her, and then seeing my friends get married, and then seeing some of my friends get divorced.....

I would choose option 2.

That said, I've totally become a believer in what brother hyper said in that other thread (I started it, and I can't even remember the name of the thread)...

I hate that dreaded "M" word.  Ugh.

Wasalaam.
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"Thus let me live, unseen, unknown; thus unlamented let me die...and not a soul tell where I lie."

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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #9 on: January 19, 2007, 02:08:26 PM »

salaam,

I choose: someone that loves me!
What everyone here says is true! A husband that doesnt love you but you love them - (picture me waving my finger side to side)- not for me.


peace
what happend to the poll?
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muhsen
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #10 on: January 19, 2007, 03:33:20 PM »

I m married....But my comments are,
I would mary one who love me...


Would you hear The Reason ?
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nuh
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #11 on: January 19, 2007, 04:27:23 PM »

[slm]


Say you only had two choices: Would you marry someone who you loved and didn't love you or someone who loved you and you didn't love.... and why?


I would marry someone who loved me and I didn't love.

Whoever works any act of righteousness and has faith, His endeavour will not be rejected: We shall record it in his favour. (21:94)

Marriage is a righteous institution, it is my belief that I have a strong capacity to 'grow love'.

I think that it is imperative to remember that one who quickly falls into love can just as quickly fall out of love.  Love is dynamic, it grows and dies by the actions of the couple. 

The parallel I have used for years is that love and marriage are like a garden.  If you don't care for it, water it, nurture it and let Allah's glorious sun shine upon it, weeds and starvation will choke it out and kill it.

And He it is Who has created man from the water, then He has made for him blood relationship and marriage relationship, and your Lord is powerful. (25.54 )

Wa salaama,

nuh
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Jannah
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #12 on: January 19, 2007, 04:49:46 PM »

Walaikum salaam warahmatullah wabarakatuhu,

i took out the poll so ppl could put their WHYs... interesting almost overwhelming majority would rather have someone that loved them... guess it's our inherent need to be loved!  read a saying once...

to love is nothing,
to be loved is something,
to love and be loved is everything.
[flower4u]
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Reem
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #13 on: January 20, 2007, 02:54:08 PM »

salaamz,

I would definitely marry someone that loved me and not the other way around.  I agree with Siham, women are more a lot more flexible than we think. If I married someone that loved me, obviously he would treat me well and do everything to keep me happy and content. Who would not fall in love with that?

On the other hand, imagine having the person you love treat you like crap or just be completely apathetic towards you. Uhhhh.......no thanks
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muhsen
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Re: Who would u marry?
« Reply #14 on: January 20, 2007, 03:37:57 PM »

Actualy I was falling in love with some1, while i was married...
I have got, that your ( in this case my love) doesnt count for her,although she knew I love her.... And I got most sadd thinks from her..and affect my life and damaged it...
But I was suprized, hows some another one ask me do I like her too? that was weird.. I was thinking, how come she to this question.... ...
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